Health care bill won’t cover treatment for BPD

It is highly probably that you have never heard of BPD, and yet statistics show that more than 175,000 of you will contract the disorder every DAY.   And those are old stats – circa 2007 – according to a cursory search of both Google and Bing.

BPD, or Blogomaniacal Personality Disorder (Blog Mania for short), is defined as “an extreme need for attention characterized by obsessive web log publishing in search of a mass audience leading to a hefty book advance or movie deal.”  The disorder was first blogged about right here on WordPress and received a response that can only be described as “phenomenal” in that it registered as a mere pin drop with a total of 4 views.   Not surprising, in fact, because the disorder is marked by extreme denial and is frequently characterized as robbing its victims and their readers of a sense of humor.

In a review of the original post, it could be said that the author inadvertently buried the details in a lengthy exposition better suited to a thesis than a blog post.  Point taken.  People with BPD don’t know the meaning of brevity.  You get them wound up on a topic and you can’t make them stop tap tap tapping on the keys until they have tapped it all out of their system. 

Blog Mania claims the free time and even the on-the-job productivity of more and more American workers.  It may very well be that at some point every person with access to the internet will have created at least one blog.  Very few of them will ever be read, most of them will be abandoned, but those inflicted with BPD will continue to search for the elusive blog following.

And now the government wants to rule out BPD as a pre-existing condition not covered under the new health care bill!   For some reason they view the disorder as a mental health issue, and that means it is far more expensive to treat. 

But some legislators actually wish to encourage the spread of Blog Mania in order to create a following of their own — a following that will allow them to finance their re-election campaigns.  So they whip up the media about some talking point of the day which in turn causes the blogosphere to go viral, creating even more new blogs and blog posts.

While congress works behind closed doors to spin the virtues of their newly minted health care legislation, the scurge that is Blog Mania will soon surpass homosexuality as the primary threat to the traditional family.  It is time for congress to act!  Cure BPD NOW or the terrorists win.


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Filed under Humor, Politics, Society, writing

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